really?...no really?

okay so today in class my instructor puts a slide up of the ruins of Delphi and says this was in its heyday. then a kid says really? that's what it looked like? FAIL. and he got in to UF.
anyway, how can I not be in better shape?5 days a week I trek a mile with a 8 pound pack on my back. WTF? the heat and the pack should count for something. maybe the cookies I eat cancel it out. or the purple amp.or the green gatorade. but I am not drinking sugar free anything. forget it.

for the big 40 I want

my 40th birthday is friday. yippee. all I want are 3 things:
1) anything alan rickman. pics, movies, a worn shirt, a phone call etc.
2) a soda drink hat so I can put 2 purple AMP drinks in it and wear it at work and school.
3) an agent for PRIMIGENIO.this is as likely getting AR but I can ask.

sentence enhancers

my mom told me that she read a study that cussing was good for you. finally someone supports what I have been saying in very colorful language for years. I love cussing. I know people say that cussing is a sign of a low intelligence but that is not the case. in some circumstances there is no better word than the f bomb.
the f word is awesome. it can show so many emotions.it is a verb, a noun and an adjective.it isn't that I can't think of another word.my vocabulary is RICH. it's that it makes a high impact. when you hear it, you know what is meant. and when you tack on the mighty mother to it...
I don't have a problem with my daughter using the words even though she hears them frequently. I told her that you had to be a specific age to say certain words. this is a good idea. think about it. she is learning othere word instead, building her vocab before she adds cuss words. she follows this rule to the letter. I haven't had any problem with her letting a few go when they were well deserved. she seems okay with having to wait until she is old enough to use them. she is having a more difficult time waiting until she is old enough to have a Nintendo DS, which I consider part of the end of humanity as we know it.

amendment to my stance on grocery getters

MAYBE getters would be cool if you had skulls and flames painted on the side. or you had Shaggin Waggin painted on the side.

a cat turd on life's mat

today the stars we're not lining up for me. like always, it started fine. my test seemed to go well. then fortune left a cat turd on my mat. I was trying to enter my ms in the florida writers association contest and I didn't make it to the post office on time. such is life. next I have gotten a total of 3 no thank yous from agents today. no thank yous take the optimism out of me. I don't mind them when the straggle in. when they come in mulitples...that sucks.I am remaining positive and am keeping up the search. I know my story is good. I just have to find the right agent. I am working with a fab editor and I think we can tune up my story to something even more fab.
maybe what is really bumming me is the approach of 40's death drum. I hear it louder by the hour. friday is the day. black friday, as I am calling it. I am thinking it will be another dull day, made worse by my turning 40. I think I will buy some manic panic and dye my hair purple.

laughing when I shouldn't be laughing

yes, I have a messed up sense of humor.thank God. I laugh at the most inappropriate things. I can sit and think of funny things and start laughing. and I have been known to laugh so hard that, well, you get the idea. I laughed all the way through my cousins wedding. I was a bridesmaid and when the greek orthodox priest started singing, I just lost it. then the rest of the bridesmaids started. the best time was when I started laughing at the tower of london torture and punishment exhibit. there was an enlarged engraving of a crowd gathered for an execution and so many people came that the stands collapsed. the picture looked like a cartoon with a dust cloud and everything. I just lost it. the yeoman warder thought I was funny but my very serious friend didn't think it was funny. he was humiliated. I don't know why. we didn't know those people.
I don't laugh at serious things like emergencies. in those situations my profanity filter disappears but I don't laugh. oh and my dramatic delivery increases.
laughter is awesome!I feel sorry for people who don't laugh freely or have a sense of humor. they are missing out on a great part of life.

oh by the way bernie

this is an awesome video from gator growl a few years ago and I dedicate it to the man who had the nerve to ask the city of jacksonville to curb the amount of alcohol sold on the weekend of the florida georgia game.I'm not advocating drunkeness but damn bernie. do you really want everyone to hate you?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBC32HihvUk

I got dusted by an old lady driving a minivan from georgia

driving to class, I got beat by a minivan. it gets worse. there was a little old lady driving it and there was a georgia tag on the van. it may as well have been a goat cart.
I can't stand minivans. I call them grocery getters. to me they are symbols of giving up your youth and buying into the corporate suburban dream. that sounds a it militant but there it is.
I will never drive one. even as I see my friends dropping to the siren call of them,I stand firm. or I ride firm.
just so you know...I rock an escape hybrid.

it was all fun and games until the cops showed up

today has been an off day. first a friend called me with awful news. I didn't know whether to skip class and go get her or what. next I got sick in the middle of class. fortunately I made it out. finally I was attacked by a huge ant mound.
the ant mound thing was bad. it happened when I was thoroughly enjoying myself watching a step show outside of turlington hall. also there was a big 4 square game going that brought back tons of memories. then the cops showed up. they didn't do anything except look ominous because a large crowd of happy students gathered. I suspect the president of the university was behind it. he seems intent on crushing all attempts at fun at the university of florida.

ready to be the crazy old lady

so okay 40 is quickly creeping up on me. it's not so much getting older that scares or bothers me. I am fully committed to being the old lady at the nursing home who pees in the plants and the nurses and cnas bribe with mountain dew to take her medicine and get dressed. it's the thought of becoming uncool or out of touch that gets me.
maybe that comes from not know what I want to do. more precisely wanting to do so much and not being able to make up my mind. right now i am finishing my costume design degree and trying to get an agent for my manuscript and get published. those are enough right now. especially the manuscript part. that is consuming me.

one more thing

I plan to make myself a sash for the fall that says oldest undergrad in sotd. you know, like the one's pageant winners and mayoral candidates in cartoons wear.

after a 34 semester break

OK so last fall I went back to school. this was after my 34 semester break from the university of florida. the theatre department was kind enough to let me back in but I think it was partly because I can serve as a cautionary tale for wayward students. how much does that ROCK?!?!! I love being back in school and it feels like I have gotten part of my soul back.I am the oldest undergrad in the school of theatre and dance and i could be some of my classmates' mom but fuck it.
each day on campus provides a new adventure for me. I'll just go ahead and get the ' we didn't have cool stuff like this when I was here before' thing out of the way. what I wonder is how much uf will change before maddy gets here.

Just checking

True to my usual form, I didn't go to bed when I planned. I got an urge to record the little gems of my life for all to see. Most of the time, these are reserved for the few who have the good fortune and spirit to hang around me. So, I have cut the cake, so to speak, and now am ready to eat.
ooohh man cake sounds good.